never work again.


gastric is killing me.
din slept well.









/laters

home.

bugis.
met jie.
was trying to play this game to win a 6610.
almost got it,
but!!
never.
urgh.
damn it.


gastric,
headache,
giddy,
cold sweating non-stop.
xiang shi bing.
i miss that gf of mine.
=((((((



tomorrow gotta go work,
bo bians.
gotta wake up at 8.30am,
latest 9am.
it's gonna be a damn boring day.
yawns BIGBIG.



i don't think i want find someone to work alternate days with me already.
lols.
if i work like that continuosly myself,
every week a off day.
i can earn up to 1.5k can.
$_$






ok,
off to sleep.






GF!!! FASTER COME BACK!! I MISS U LAH!!! NO ONE TO NAG AT ME!! =(((

counting down to thurs.
3 more days.
ahhhh
i miss that girl so so so so much.


din work today,
was having very terrible gastric problem last night,
MUST be the BK MEALS i ate yesterday. tsk*
it's been so long since i've been like this.


ohhhhhhhh,
i wonder what gf is doing now.
gf must be enjoying bio-ing good looking bungs who never bind.
lols.
she msged me and told me that ok.
tsk.
gf ah gf,
i misssss u lah!!!! =((




Nokia6670 is go fucking ex.
i want that phone!!
=






/laters

worked.
stood for fucking 11 hours.
roars.

gf came to look for me before she fly,
she's in taipei now.
and i miss her fucking hell lot.


tomorrow work again,
gonna stand another 11 hours.
boring please.
tsk*




counting down to thurs.



i miss that girl. =(((

mornings.


gf woke me up for work.
=))




now eating my breakfast and poofs* off to work already.
it's gonna be a long journey,
so i'm gonna sleep!!
yawns.
less then 5 hours of sleep.






miss gf,
i misses you a lot.
hope i can see you later k?
=))








you know i love you!

i tell you,
employers nowadays are damn *(@$*!&@^#!)(@*!!!

i went for this roadshow interview with qiuyan.
they chose she and her friend but not me.
what the fuck right?
TSK!

met sylvia jie.
along with maomao and shufen.
i've made new friends,
bin, june(her gf), yun hui.

went ktv-ing with them,
without shufen.
lols.
i swear they can be really crazy.

i sang "one night in beijing" in the end.
the high pitch part?
my throat nearly exploded.


cabbed back with bin, june and mao.
thanks bin for ya lift. =)))



i swear that mop face's owner is damn cute.

gf: ok la.i got the urge to say this, and i bet you will show everyone this. I LOVE YOU UNTIL WANT TO DIE ALREADY.

indeed, i showed everyone. HERE!! lols.

gf, i love u till i'm already dead.
=P


mop face's owner is going to taiwan soon on sat.
tsk*
(please take good care of my heart when you're outta town.ESPECIALLY when you're on the plane, it will have flight air sick.)--->she corrected me.



i hope sat don't come..................

nothing but fear and ______ had overcomed myself.

i'm no more me.


it can really kill one,
it's eating me up.



i'm being selfish.
totally.






/i ain't me








i'm missing you so much

i sense something not good.
sighs.
i feel so sissified all of a sudden.
i feel like crying again?
no idea why.
probably just scared.


i love you just too much.



i feel like i'm being a very bad gf.
i feel like i'm useless.
i feel like i'm nothing.
i feel like shit.


you're always the 1st priority.




lost of words.
i don't know how to exactly describe the way i feel now.






sighs.
someone kill me please.






you are my everything

tanning later.
with a bunch of people i don't know and gf.
kian, serene pris and jav coming along.


met gf just now.
for a few hours only.
but still,
i saw her. =))



and she's goin to taiwan this sat for a week.
eekss,
how i wish sat will never come.
i'm gonna miss her like hell.
tsk.
sat don't come, sat don't come, sat don't come, sat don't come.

my mum's cooking taste and smells fishy.
eeww,
god.
don't want eat anymore,
i might just puke.


wahh!!
i've wasted another day.
no interviews during peak hours and look at the time now.
grrr.


and miss gf just woke up.






/laters

*tatayoung/thinkofyou



When I’m down and all alone
When nothing seems to matter
When I lose my hope
When I’m sad and confused

When it all gets turned around and ‘round
I can’t seem to reach for solid ground
When everything I’ve believed in seems untrue
All I have to do

Chorus
Is think of you
I think of you and it’s gone
Like you chase away the storm
Making it all okay
I think of you
I think of you and I’m strong
And I know I can go on
It’s like you set me free
When life gets the best of me
I just think of you


Now I know what love means
And whatever life may hold for me
Through the fire
Through the rain I believe

Cause there’s nothing I can’t bear
Knowing that you will be there
If I fall I won’t break
Through it all I’ll make it through
Cause all I have to do

(Chorus)

And when I think I’m all alone
I can’t see the way to go
Lost in the rain of my own tears
To wash away the pain and fear

(Chorus)

For the good times and the bad times
I just think of you
Cause you know you get the best of me
I just think of you

bad day.
urgh.

supposed to meet gf.
but in the end her nini lost.
she no mood come out.

i dug out all my coins savings,
apparently majority of it was moldy.
it's green.
but who cares,
i still use them.
it's still money afterall.
cleared them all.

went bishan.
lerrick and me wasn't in very good mood.
saw someone i don't like and i was cursing and swearing like nobody's business.
da sao cursed with me too.
HAH.
devon and deb joined us after a while.
and a little of beck and mao.

oh,
ate some seafood soup thingy with rice.
puked some of it out.
wasn't feeling very nice and still not feeling very nice.


sighs,
i miss that gf of mine alot.
=/





/laters

goin to meet mop face's owner later. =D

((The nice nice test mop face's owner did for me, she's so cute lah *melts.))

> 1. What's my name?:
> :: bj.
> 2. Where did we meet?
> :: hahaha. where?
> 3. Take a stab at my middle name:
> :: this one can dont care.
> 4. How long have you known me?
> :: ahh .. lets see. 2 months plus.
> 5. How well do you know me?In a scale of 1-
> 10.
> :: 8.
> 6. Do I smoke?
> :: yes.
> 7. Do I believe in God?
> :: yes.
> 8. When you first saw me, what was your
> impression?
> :: xia lan la.
> 9. My age?
> :: 19.
> 10. Birthday?
> :: 19th aug.
> 11. what is my hair color?
> :: black and red.
> 12. Eye color?
> :: black.
> 13. Have you ever had a crush on me?
> :: lalala.
> 14. What's one of my favorite things to do?
> :: smoke!
> 15. Do you remember one of the 1st things I
> said to you?
> :: monks? tonight?
> 16. What's my favorite type of music?
> :: r&b
> 17. What is the best feature about me?
> :: your fats. lol. okok, face.
> 18. Am I shy or outgoing?
> :: very outgoing.
> 19. Would you say I am funny?
> :: yes. very.
> 20. Am I a rebel or do I follow all the rules?
> :: rebel.
> 21. Any special talents?
> :: singing? i think so.
> 22. Would you consider me a friend?
> :: no. my gf.
> 23. Would you call me preppy,slutty,a
> homie,average,sporty,punk,
> hippie,glam,nerdy,snobby,silent,raver,rocker,or
> something else?
> :: hippie.
> 24. Have you ever seen me cry?
> :: nah. maybe almost?
> 25. If there was one good nickname for me,
> what would it be?
> :: mop face's ownwer's gf. lol.
> 26. What/Who do I love?
> :: YOU LOVE ME.
> 27. Have i ever told you I liked you?
> :: yes.
> 28. Have I ever been in love?
> :: of course you did.
> 29. When was the last time we spent time
> together?
> :: few hours ago.
> 30. What is my favorite food?
> :: you eat everything!
> 31. My favorite movie?
> :: woah .. a lot.
> 32. Do i have a pet?
> :: yes. your fats. lol.
> 33. Do you think i'm cool?
> :: ahh ... quite. dont float.
> 34. If we're together, are you proud of me?
> :: why not? :p
> 35. Am i the type you'd want to marry?
> :: lol. no!
> 36. If,in one hr,I'll b gone 4ever...what will b ur
> last words 4 me
> :: last 4 words .. havent thought of it. cos its the
last 4 words. but i wouldnt want you t be gone
forever. we will stick right?
>
--------------------------------------------------------
((what i did for her!))

> 1. What's my name?:
> ::Amanda Chia *** ****
>
> 2. Where did we meet?
> ::1st time? right in fourskin store!
>
> 3. Take a stab at my middle name:
> :: -blank-
>
> 4. How long have you known me?
> ::plus this 2mths 13 days. i think roughly about
> 3mths plus?
>
> 5. How well do you know me?In a scale of 1-
> 10.
> ::=\ 7
>
> 6. Do I smoke?
> ::YES
>
> 7. Do I believe in God?
> :: well, maybe?
>
> 8. When you first saw me, what was your
> impression?
> ::"this girl is CUTE"
>
> 9. My age?
> ::15
>
> 10. Birthday?
> :: 150389
>
> 11. what is my hair color?
> :: red now. and a little of black.
>
> 12. Eye color?
> :: huh. i don't know eh. =/
>
> 13. Have you ever had a crush on me?
> :: i'm deeply in love with you now. =))
>
> 14. What's one of my favorite things to do?
> :: hit my swollen breast and my CUTE tummy.
>
> 15. Do you remember one of the 1st things I
> said to you?
> :: erms, we were talking about ya that green
dunk?
>
> 16. What's my favorite type of music?
> ::r&b and techno (i forced myself to say that.)
>
> 17. What is the best feature about me?
> :: everything! =))
>
> 18. Am I shy or outgoing?
> ::act shy only lor. lols.
>
> 19. Would you say I am funny?
> :: well, sad to say, yes.
>
> 20. Am I a rebel or do I follow all the rules?
> :: sometimes rebel, sometimes follow.
>
> 21. Any special talents?
> :: playing with studs lor.
>
> 22. Would you consider me a friend?
> :: you're my gf for goodness sake!
>
> 23. Would you call me preppy,slutty,a
> homie,average,sporty,punk,
> hippie,glam,nerdy,snobby,silent,raver,rocker,or
> something else?
> :: xia lan. =D
>
> 24. Have you ever seen me cry?
> :: just now lor.
>
> 25. If there was one good nickname for me,
> what would it be?
> :: PIG and nothing else but PIG.
>
> 26. What/Who do I love?
> ::you can ONLY love ME!
>
> 27. Have i ever told you I liked you?
> ::you always say you don't like me =(
>
> 28. Have I ever been in love?
> ::are you in love now?
>
> 29. When was the last time we spent time
> together?
> ::just like 2 hours ago =))
>
> 30. What is my favorite food?
> ::OUR fav, cookies and cream ice cream!
>
> 31. My favorite movie?
> ::i don't know.
>
> 32. Do i have a pet?
> ::two white creature. nicky and jo.
>
> 33. Do you think i'm cool?
> ::NOT AT ALL. lols.
>
> 34. If we're together, are you proud of me?
> ::we are already together. =)) and i'm proud of u.
>
> 35. Am i the type you'd want to marry?
> :: i said i'll marry you.
>
> 36. If,in one hr,I'll b gone 4ever...what will b ur
> last words 4 me
> :: i will always love you, no matter what. =))
>
----------------------------------------------------


i just love this girl so much. =))

Can say today is the best day of my whole life.

mop face's owner was out with me the whole day.
ok, not exactly whole day,
but still. =)))
lerrick and the rest was there too.
i'm a happy bung now.


things are a little bit more better now,
and i hope it will turn out good.
i wanna last with you till the very last breathe of mine,
remember i've said,
i will marry you? =)))











shewillbeloved

i've heard a lot of things i'm not supposed to know last night.
i'm disappointed with them.
very.


backstabbers?
come try to stab in front of me right into my eyes.
don't be a coward.



you,

I'm sorry for whatever that had happeneed and i want the best outta for the both of us.I hope we'll be able to work things out better.
You know i can't do without you.


iloveyou

just got home.




k.o.










i'm sorry gf. =/














/laters

goin to ivan's dad funeral later on.

boring day.


*tsk

This song is classic.
And Renee Olstead is only fucking 17!!





for you,



"A Love That Will Last"

I want a little something more
Don't want the middle or the one before
I don't desire a complicated past
I want a love that will last

Say that you love me
Say im the one
Don't kiss and hug me and then try to run
I don't do drama
My tears don't fall fast
I want a love that will last

[Chorus]
I don't want a just a memory
Gives me forever
Don't even think about saying good-bye
Cuz i want just one love to be enough
And remain in my heart till i die

So call me romantic
Oh i guess that must be so
Theres something more that you oughta know
I'll never leave you
So don't even ask
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love that will last
I want a love that will last

[Chorus]
I don't want a just a memory
Gives me forever
Don't even think about saying good-bye
Cuz i want just one love to be enough
And remain in my heart till i die

So theres little more that i need
I wanna share all the air you breathe
I'm not the kinda girl to complicate the past
I want a love that will last

Forever
I want a love the love that last
Always
I just want a love that will last
Want a love that will last

------------------------------------

you'll never know how it feels to be me right now,
disappointed?
upset?
angry?
whatever.
i just feel like shit!!


it makes me wonder where do i stand in ya heart,
you never thought of how would i feel.
you never..

isn't love something that both parties should work on and not one?
it seems like i'm all alone.




/total lost of words

i'm feeling so tighted up inside.




i can't breathe properly.






i wanna scream my lungs out.



all of a sudden,
i just feel like crying.














call me a sissy,
i don't give a fuck.
i just wanna cry.
but i can't.........




































*sighs

meet lerrick, devon and her friend angie.
a little of da sao, kane and flea.


devon's over at my place now.




M O O D L E S S























/laters

good morning world.

preparing and getting ready to have dim sum with family.

couldn't sleep well yesterday night.
or rather just now.
i miss that girl. =((



*becauseyoulive/jessemaccartney


Staring out at the rain with a heavy heart
It's the end of the world in my mind
Then your voice calls me back like a wake up call
I've been looking for the answer
Somewhere
I couldn't see that it was right there
But now I know what I didn't know

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky

It's alright, I survived, I'm alive again
Cuz of you, made it though every storm
What is life, what's the use if you're killing time
I'm so glad I found an angel
Someone
Who was there when all my hopes fell
I wanna fly, looking in your eyes

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky
Because you live, I live

Because you live there's a reason why
I carry on when I lose the fight
I want to give what you've given me always

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has everything I need to survive

Because you live, I live, I live

---------------------







/laters

i can't fucking hell sleep.
*sighs
i miss that gf of mine.


gotta wake up at 9am.
goin for dim sum with parents.
how filial can i get?
well,
it's been a long time since the whole family goes out to eat.



well,
off to bed and try to sleep now bj.










i'm sorry for all those bad attitudes i've been giving you,
i'll try to change,
i hope i'll change.
i'm sorry girl to have hurt you so many times.
you know i still love you as much,
as much as before.













/laters

meeting cal, kane, lerrick and devon soon.









grrrrrrrrrrrr
















MOODSWINGS!

my gf want's to keep a monkey.

she doesn't want her sotong anymore. =(((((

that mop face's owner din sleep for whole night!!
=don't know what's bothering her till she can't sleep.

she's out with family i guess.
*sighs
i hope she'll be fine.


i couldn't sleep well the whole night too.
seem like i've been waking up every min.
no idea why.


dad, mum and sis out.
i'm all alone at home.
with no one talking to me,
and she not replying my msg.
feel so lonely all of a sudden.
*tsk


suddenly remember the song winnie introduced to me,
Jason Mraz - Absouloutly Zero.
downloading now,
that song's damn nice and damn meaninful.
now shall be a song downloading session,
will download every song that comes to my mind.
1st would be the song by twins,
"Xia Yi Zhan Tian Hou".
Canto song,
damn nice.


sometimes i think,
am i being too much when it comes to controlling her.
overpossesiveness,
jealousy,
my attitude problem.
bahs!!
it's uncontrollable please,
no idea why have i've became like this.




well,
that's all for now.







/laters

seens doc.
chinese doc.

he said nothing,
but kept asking about my piercing.
*tsk.





sighs.









many things are bothering my mind.

hello peeps.

sick. =(((((


headache,
non-stop flowing mucus,
backache,
cough,
upcoming fever.






am gonna stay home the whole day today.
and die of bordem and sickness.
whoaaa!!
what an exciting day to come.






tomorrow don't want go out also cannot,
Mr Dylan holding a very impt talk at 12PM.
Yawns*
must drag my arse outta the housee.














well,
gf's out.
and i miss her =((((((

finally all my testis are back. =))


office.
towned.
coffeeclub-ed.

saw gf for a while. =((


ktv-ed with devon, serene deb and jie.
did some work after that.






gonna get a part time job.
and next year is her N's.
i'm so afraid that we might not have time for each other.
or maybe,
i won't have time for her.




i hope she'll understand.










girl,
you know no matter how busy i am,
i will still squeeze time out for you.
you know i will. =))


















i






love










mop




face's








owner.











my














pig wifey. =)))))

2 headed snakes,
bloody selfish arseholess.







what dex said is so true,
now i've realised there's so many fake people around.
yucks!








RAWRS!!

gf's out with her buddy.
BAHS.





going company at 4.

god god god.









i miss mop face's owner very much

company conflicts.
HAH.
tell me about it.




girl, you know there will never be "what if(s)".
You know i'll never leave,
and i'll make sure you do the same.
I will never ignore you,
and neither will i allow you to be very sick.
I will take good care of you.
I'll make sure and show it to everyone,
we CAN make it.
we'll always be. =)))








i miss that mop face's owner. =((((

Haven't been feeling good these pass few days.
Moodswings is killing me,
and her i guess.



Do she know that she's the one and only,
now and always?
Do she know how much i truly love her?
Do she know that how much i do still care for her?
Do she know that without her, i will be nothing?
Do she know that every beat of my heart and every breath that i take,
she's on my mind.
Do she know??




*tilltheend


all these precious moments,
with you by my side.
must be a gift from heaven,
that's holding me all night.
i don't know how i found you,
i'm thankful that i had.
that i've a love so true,
to hold, to keep, to share.

in my heart,
i can no longer hold inside,
all of the love i used to hide.
i'd always be with you until the very end.
in this world,
there is no place i'd rather be,
you are my life, my soul, my girl.
been through it all,
i know you've come to see,
that you're the one,
till the end.


all my friends around me,
say you'll be gone too soon.
baby i'm gonna make them see,
we've found our way back home.


we'll always be,
till the end.
------------------------------





tell me how much you love me, tell me if it's true.

i miss her for god knows how much.
*sighs.

wonder when will i see her again.







drank with cal,
4 bottles tiger.





ktv at "ten dollar" ktv in chinatown with NTI fellows.
xiumei's birthday.












*headache

friends and me.
F R I E N D S.












































I'm nothing.

i feel like a fool,
suddenly.





yes,
a total fool.














i might sound stupid, but i just feel my heart being stabbed

My dear,
here i promise my full commitment to you.
And i want you to know,
that i love you wholeheartedly and with all my soul.







No one can take that special place you have with me, in my heart and mind.

here goes the mushroom fan..
there goes the mushroom fan..
here goes the mushroom fan..
there goes the mushroom fan..

daddy? daugther wants her breakfast.
Quit torturing her.
Quit ill treating her.
This is a crime you know?
-pouts.

office.
towned.



met miss wifey.
i miss her so so so so so so so much. =((((



it's been so long i've last seen sandra,
i'm so glad i saw her today. =)
went coffee club with sandra, kane and cal.
talked cock,
sing song.
am gonna go k box and then off to sandra's house to play majhong on x`mas eve.
geez.



caught "Princess Diaries 2".
jas,jenny and bf.
That show is good,
WATCH IT!!
(ok, i think cathy should give me commission for advertising for them!! how about $10 per person intro-ed? heh. $_$ )







AND!!!
TODAY'S OUR 2ND!!
HAPPY 2ND MONTH MY WIFEY. I LOVE YOU! =))))))




you know i wanna be with you, as long as i breathe.
you're my everything,
and everything,
and,
everything.

monk-ed.
so dead.
boring.
drank quite a bit.


my own gf says some other people like that ONE is cute and funny.
i don't think so.
sucks big time.




URGH!
i miss my gf









*finish

those acts i have,
what do they show?

i love you too much







down to company at 5.30pm.






















*poofs

no one and nothing can take her away from me!!

mood?

sucky.








RAWRS!!!


















*offtodie

met my pretty gf today. =))
watched shark tale.
it's a damn funny show.
watch it! =D



oh wells.
was very affected by whatever you've told me.
as i said,
feels like my heart got stabbed a millions of times,
and got gorge outta my rip cage.
PAIN!!
but then,
i rather you tell me now straight,
then to let me find out.
and i'll feel a hundred and million times worse.




met deb and clay.
both of them was mugging like no one's business.
feel so damn stress for them.
good luck to you both for the paper tomorrow.
good luck to all the O's takers. =))









oh,
did i say before?
that my gf is my everything and everything.
maybe i did said before,
just repeating it.
OH!!
AND!!
SHE'S MINE AND MINE AND MINE!!! ALL MINE!!



i love you =)

back from ktv session.
jas, elfie, peiyi, karen, winnie and bf. =)
my last day of work.

my god,
i've totally got no idea why am i feeling so sad about myself leaving eight inch.
damn!






am i still a friend to you?
i doubt you'll regard me as one anymore.
sighs.
i'm sorry for all these that had happened,
i won't blame you for treating me this way.
well,
i do deserve it,
very much indeed.










gf's fast asleep.
i miss her. =))









jue bu neng shi qu ni